Julian Gerber
January 9, 2016
As you may have noticed, this service is quite literally un-orthodox. Instead, it’s a humanistic service. Humanistic Judaism focuses more on the cultural aspect of Judaism than the religious aspect. Humanistic Jews don’t regard the Torah as a divine truth, but more of a guideline for ethics and morals that can be changed, or added on to, depending on the society around us. Therefore, my Bar Mitzvah is less about a God or the Torah and more about a milestone in my life and the values and interests that I have chosen at this stage of my life. However, if my Bar Mitzvah is just about values, then what makes the thirteenth birthday the one we discuss our values on? The answer is, it’s a tradition. Ever since around the fifteenth century, Jewish boys have been having Bar Mitzvahs at the age of thirteen because it is believed that by the age of thirteen, you are now responsible for your actions and for following the commandments. However, although it was a tradition for boys, it took about 400 more years for girls to get bat mitzvahs. My Bar Mitzvah is non traditional in the sense that we don’t follow the commandments because of an all-powerful deity, but because we are ethically and morally compelled to do so as humans. We retain some of the tradition by keeping it on or nearby our thirteenth birthday.
This was a very long process and, reflecting back on it, the one thing I think of is the work. But through that work I have learned so much about the process of becoming a Bar Mitzvah. One of the more basic principles I learned from this is the responsibility and importance of planning my time. Over the past two years I have had to complete these five papers, including research, efficiently to get it done in time for around my thirteenth birthday. Additionally, during the family history project I got a lot of insight into the story of where my family came from and how we ended up here. Without this Bar Mitzvah, I most likely would not have gotten a chance to discover this.
I think there were a few reasons as to why my parents wanted me to have a Bar Mitzvah. Part of it I think was simply because of tradition. Neither of my parents became a bar or bat mitzvah but it was still traditional in my mom’s family to have a bar mitzvah. Another reason is that it’s an important part of being a part of this congregation. When my sister was in fifth grade, my parents decided to raise her (and eventually me) as a Humanistic Jew. They liked what Humanistic Judaism meant and felt connected to its message. A part of the process of understanding this message is through becoming a Bar or Bat Mitzvah. Lastly, probably the most important reason (to me at least) is the self-discovery involved in this congregation’s Bar Mitzvah process. Without this, I wouldn’t have had an opportunity to think about myself in the way I did here today.
Finally, I would like to thank the people who made all this possible. First and foremost, my parents, for continuously encouraging me throughout the entirety of my Bar Mitzvah preparation and for planning the whole celebration. Next I would like to thank Rabbi Peter and Isabel Kaplan for guiding me through this process as well as the thought provoking edits to make my papers even better. Thank you to my sister, Rachel for supporting me even from college. Thank you to Anne Shonbrun and Mika Nishamura for the amazing music. Thank you to Kelsey and Grant and everyone else at the Gotham for all the planning and tech support. Last but definitely not least, a huge thank you to my mentor Emy Zener, for all the guidance you gave in coming up with ideas for and writing these papers. Without you, none of this would be possible. Also, Emy, thank you for teaching me how to use a comma and that artistic license is not a good excuse for bad grammar. This has been a long process. A process that could not have been completed without you all and even though this has been challenging, it has most definitely been worth it.
